Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. Here is one important piece of advice: If a warrant for your arrest is executed during your interview, before the authorities drag you out, quickly tell the interviewer you're willing to work nights and weekends. That might be enough to balance out the negative impression caused by seeing you taken away in cuffs.

An Important Message From Grandmother Winsome

While I understand the impulse to jump in excitement whenever you see a new post on the Grandmother's Fanny Game blog, first check the structural integrity of your building to make sure it's safe to do so.

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home

When I got to the Birch Street Nursing Home this morning, I found Mr. Pearlman lying on the front lawn with his ankle bleeding. I asked him what happened. He asked me if Sniffles The Seventh was still there. I looked around, but didn't see any dogs. Mr. Pearlman wouldn't tell me any more, but just kept repeating that Sniffles was a bad dog. I cleaned him up as best I could and helped him up to his room. After I closed his door to let him rest, I saw Mr. Matthews in the hallway. He told me he witnessed the whole thing from his window, and invited me into his room so that he could fill me in. There was a stray dog barking out front, Mr. Matthews told me, and he pointed to the spot from his window. Soon he saw Mr. Pearlman stumble outside without his walking cane. The dog came right over to him, but when Mr. Pearlman tried to grab it by its collar and drag it inside, the dog bit him and then ran away. Mr. Matthews offered to reenact the whole thing if I would play the part of Mr. Pearlman, but I told him that wasn't necessary. Mr. Pearlman's ordeal was the talk of the poker club today. Mrs. Patterson said he just hasn't been the same since Sniffles The Seventh ran away, and wondered if it was time for him to get a new seeing eye dog.

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. One important tip is that if someone starts screaming in your basement during the interview, all you have to do is tell the interviewer that you're having your house painted and one of the workers just fell off a ladder. Then add that you need to take a moment to make sure the painter is okay. This will actually reflect well on you, for you'll seem to be a compassionate person. It will also give you time to reset the gag and administer a stronger dose of sedative to the offending individual.

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home

I was worried this morning when Angel didn't show up at the Birch Street Nursing Home with Crystal and Cinnamon. So when Mr. Smith arrived at the end of the day to pick them up, I asked him if Angel was okay. He assured me she was fine, and would be back in thirty days.

Spread The Word

Help spread the word! If you are a contestant on a game show, be sure to tell the audience that you're a dedicated follower of Grandmother's Fanny Game. And then win big, Kiddies!

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice

Kiddies, if you go on a game show, be sure to disguise your appearance and give the host a false name and biography. You don't want to risk the chance of the authorities catching your episode and being able to put your name and face together.

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. One important tip is to not use loud music to drown out the screams from your basement during the interview. Doing so would come across as unprofessional.

An Important Tip For Divers

Kiddies, when diving for pleasure or for treasure, always be sure to tuck a feather into your wet suit. That way, if you should find yourself suddenly inside a whale, you can pull out the feather and tickle the roof of its mouth, and when it sneezes you'll be free to continue your dive.

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home

Though there was no party today at the Birch Street Nursing Home, everyone was still in a festive mood, and the energy at the poker tables was high. At least until two policemen showed up and made Mrs. Lieberman nervous. She quickly hid the cards and stuffed the money up under her sweater. But it turned out they were just two of Cinnamon's regular doctors, playing dress-up in order to cheer her up. Later we could hear them shouting at her, "Freeze, you're under arrest!"

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. One thing you should do is place a copy of your resume in front of you, but just out of frame. It could come in handy if the interviewer asks you about any of the previous positions you've claimed to have held, or schools you've claimed to have attended.

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. One important thing to keep in mind is to not let the fact that you are at home allow you to become too comfortable with the information you share. Anecdotes about sexual conquests or time spent in prison are not appropriate during a job interview, no matter where it is conducted.

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home

Today on my way to the Birch Street Nursing Home, I stopped at the store to buy sandwiches, fruit punch, popcorn and decorations. Mrs. Lieberman had donated half of her winnings from last week's poker tournament to throw a party, and I was in charge of doing the shopping. The patients were already up and in the activity room when I arrived. While Mrs. Macmillan and I put up the decorations, Mrs. Henley offered to set up the tray of sandwiches. Mrs. Lieberman brought out the radio and cranked up the oldies. The party was so much fun, that even two of Cinnamon's regular doctors joined us for a cup of fruit punch on their way out.

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Online Job Interviews

Kiddies, most companies have adopted the practice of conducting their job interviews online. While job interviews can be a cause of anxiety, and this new type of interview presents its own challenges, do not worry. Grandmother Winsome is here to help. One important piece of advice is to think carefully before offering your excuse for being late to the online job interview. "I lost my internet connection" is much more believable than "I had trouble finding parking."