Sunday, June 25, 2017

Spread The Word


When filling out your will, be sure to stipulate that "Dedicated follower of Grandmother Winsome" must be engraved on your tombstone.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Cindy Visits Mrs. Chang


Today, when I went to the cemetery for Mrs. Chang's monthly grave cleaning, I found a lot of gum stuck to the headstone. It took me most of the afternoon to get it all scraped off, but now her stone looks as good as new. Happy birthday, Mrs. Chang!

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Spread The Word


Help spread the word, Kiddies! If you work at a bakery, write "Follow Grandmother Winsome" in pink on all the display cakes.

Friday, June 16, 2017

A Message From Grandmother Winsome


Not all cries for help should be answered.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living


Even in summer, be sure to take a sweater with you if you travel by plane. It often gets cool in the aircraft cabin.

And, Kiddies, don't forget your peanuts.

Friday, June 9, 2017

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice


Kiddies, there is something to be said for hiding evidence in plain sight. So why not make a necklace out of the finger bones?

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Jane's Tips For Social Interactions


Be nice to barbacks, for they are tomorrow's bartenders.

Monday, June 5, 2017

Edward's Business Adventures


What a great weekend. I took out the ice cream truck for its first trip of the season. It's hard to believe this will be my fourth year of serving delicious treats to deserving children. I decided to revisit some of my favorite parks from previous years, and the children there were excited to see me again. They came running as soon as I arrived. This promises to be a fun summer. And for those parents who have entrusted their illegal immigrant children to me, don't worry, this does not mean I will be neglecting the Traveling Babysitting Service. I left those kids in my associate's camper, and on days when I'm not too tired, I will check in on them after I've done my ice cream route.