Saturday, November 18, 2017

A Tip From Grandmother Winsome


When asking your girlfriend's parents for their permission to take her hand in marriage, strengthen your case by reminding them that you are a devoted follower of Grandmother Winsome.

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living


When selecting a home for an elderly relative, be sure to choose one that's both far from you and far from any airports. Make it as difficult as possible for him or her to pay you a visit. And if your loved one asks you to visit him or her, explain that after paying the nursing home bills, there is simply no money left over for you to travel.

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Spread The Word


If you work as a pitching coach and need to kill some time while your reliever warms up, call the infielders to the mound and read them the latest Grandmother's Fanny Game blog post.

Spread The Word


Help spread the word, Kiddies! If you work as a baseball umpire, instead of yelling "Play ball!" before the first pitch, yell "Follow Grandmother Winsome!"

Monday, October 30, 2017

Spread The Word


If you own a flower shop, have a Grandmother Winsome Birthday Special tomorrow - buy eleven pink carnations, get the twelfth one free.

Spread The Word


If you own a dry-cleaning business, have a Grandmother Winsome Birthday Special tomorrow - a dollar off each load of pink clothing.

Spread The Word


If you own a bakery, have a Grandmother Winsome Birthday Special tomorrow - 10% off all pink cupcakes.

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living


If an elderly relative has bad breath, simply replace his or her medication with breath mints. The person's health may decline, but he or she will be more pleasant to be around during whatever days remain.

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Spread The Word


Help spread the word, Kiddies! If you've been chosen to sing the National Anthem before a baseball game, make a last-minute substitution and sing the Grandmother Winsome Theme Song instead.

Grandmother Winsome Pardons A Cat


Kiddies, in honor of National Cat Day, I've decided to grant one of my test subjects its freedom. That's right, Cat 005149 will be back out in the world, though now without its front left leg, its whiskers and its eyesight. Good luck, Cat 005149! Happy National Cat Day!