Friday, May 25, 2018

Jane's Tips For Social Interactions

Develop a fast gait, so that you can breeze by those people with clipboards who like to gather outside of post offices and other government buildings. If you move quickly enough, you'll be by them before they even have a chance to ask you if you're registered to vote.

Thursday, May 24, 2018

Spread The Word

Help spread the word, Kiddies! If you work at the Bureau of Engraving and Printing, the next time you print out dollar bills, swap out George Washington's photo with a photo of Grandmother Winsome.

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living

Kiddies, don't place dead pets in your compost bin. Place them in your neighbor's compost bin.

Monday, May 21, 2018

Jane's Tips For Social Interactions

Whenever you're waiting to be seen at the emergency room, pile your belongings on the seats to either side of you, so no one gets too close.

Sunday, May 20, 2018

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living

Kiddies, you never know when disaster might strike. So keep a printout of all the Grandmother's Fanny Game blog posts in your emergency kit.

Saturday, May 19, 2018

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home

One of my tasks each week at the Birch Street Nursing Home is to go around to all the rooms and make sure the patients are still alive. I am to make a note of the ones that aren't. I am happy to report that everyone was still alive when I checked today.

Friday, May 18, 2018

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice

Kiddies, it's a good idea to have a membership at a gym, particularly one that is open twenty-four hours and has lockers available to rent. You should always store at least one complete set of clean clothing in that locker. As you know, after certain activities, you don't want to head directly home and risk bringing evidence into your household. Instead, go to the gym, shower, and put on that clean set of clothes. Then toss the tainted clothing into a homeless person's shopping cart on your way home.

A Tip From Edward

Volunteer to man the Junior Jet ride at your local carnival or amusement park. Then you can pat down each child before he gets on. Kids will love it, and you can tell their parents you're giving their children the full, realistic air travel treatment.

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living

Always keep your cellular phone fully charged, Kiddies, for you never know when the electricity might go out for an extended period of time. Being able to read the Grandmother’s Family Game blog on your phone will set your mind at ease as you sit in the dark and wait for service to be restored.

Monday, May 14, 2018

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice

"Home reading the Grandmother's Fanny Game blog" is always a believable response when authorities ask where you were on a certain night.