Friday, December 31, 2021

Grandmother Winsome Looks Back At 2021


Kiddies, it was another fantastic year here at Winsome Headquarters. I was able to break in the new maid, who has proved herself to be extremely useful in a wide variety of areas. And there were some surprising results in my parakeet research. I'm looking forward to a great 2022.

Jane's Scientific Experiment


I am wearing my best red dress and heading to the hospital. That young doctor told me to meet him there, so he must have something big planned for us tonight if he doesn't even have time to go home before our date.

Thursday, December 30, 2021

Jane's Scientific Experiment


Yesterday I regained feeling in my legs and immediately went to the hospital to flirt with that young doctor. I told him I was available on New Year's Eve, and he told me he had an opening. Now I just have to decide which dress to wear.

Saturday, December 25, 2021

Christmas At The Birch Street Nursing Home


The patients at the Birch Street Nursing Home had a wonderful Christmas. They spent it playing poker and eating the cookies I picked up on my way there. Yesterday they finished off all the figgy pudding and corn on the cob, and I didn't think the remaining slice of fruit cake would last very long, especially with Mrs. Henley in such a jolly mood. The stakes for one hand got really high when Mr. Tanaka suddenly realized he had a straight flush. And even though that cleaned out most of the players, everyone's spirits were still high, and Mrs. Lieberman kept the game going by extending credit. I waited until they all went to bed before taking down the decorations and putting them back in the cardboard boxes for next year.

Friday, December 24, 2021

Winsome Family Christmas Tips


After your holiday dinner, before scraping any remaining food from the plates into the trash, be sure to look through it carefully for any missing dentures.

Christmas Eve At The Birch Street Nursing Home


The head nurse at the Birch Street Nursing Home just called Grandmother, asking if I was available to work this afternoon because she and the other nurses want to get an early start on their holiday. That means I can put up the Christmas decorations at the Birch Street Nursing Home today and not have to get up too early tomorrow. I've also decided to surprise the patients by making a nice Christmas Eve lunch for them, including fruit cake, figgy pudding and corn on the cob.

Thursday, December 23, 2021

Jane's Scientific Experiment


On Monday I took part in a scientific experiment, where I met a handsome, young doctor who took an instant fancy to me. He spent much more time with me than with any of the other participants in the study. And as soon as I regain feeling in my legs, I am going to head back to that hospital so that he can flirt with me some more. I will be sure to let him know I am available on New Year's Eve.

Monday, December 20, 2021

Dating Tips From The Winsome Women


One way to meet a rich, eligible man is to sign up for a scientific experiment, preferably one that takes place overnight, where there will be plenty of time for intimate one-on-one interaction with the doctor.

Sunday, December 19, 2021

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home


Yesterday at the Birch Street Nursing Home, Mr. Tanaka asked me if they usually do something special for Christmas there. I told him that the head nurse doesn't allow decorations to be put up too early, but promised him I would get there by 6 a.m. Christmas morning to decorate the place before any of the patients wake up.

Friday, December 17, 2021

Winsome Family Christmas Tips


Fear of catching the coronavirus is a great excuse to avoid kissing unattractive people under the mistletoe.

Monday, December 13, 2021

Winsome Family Christmas Tips


While children likely won't notice the stains on your Santa outfit, their parents might. You don't want to jeopardize your job at the mall, so have your costume professionally cleaned.

Saturday, December 11, 2021

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home


Today at the Birch Street Nursing Home, Mrs. Lieberman said she was a little sad that there wouldn't be as much money coming in to the poker club each week now that one of the three rooms is no longer vacant. But she was quick to add that she does enjoy playing with Mr. Tanaka, the newest patient at the Birch Street Nursing Home. Everyone else there seems to like him too, including Sniffles The Eighth, who spent the entire afternoon curled at his feet.

Friday, December 10, 2021

Winsome Family Christmas Tips


Kiddies, I know the holidays are a busy time for most people. So if you have a lot of evidence that you don't yet have time to dispose of properly, put it in large cardboard boxes and wrap those boxes in pretty paper to use as part of your elaborate outdoor holiday display. That will buy you another month before you have to dispose of it.

Wednesday, December 8, 2021

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice


If you are storing evidence in a bus terminal locker, be sure to use a combination lock. You don't want to have a key the authorities could discover in your possession that could easily connect you to the locker and its contents.

Sunday, December 5, 2021

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living


Kiddies, now is the perfect time to buy stock in companies that manufacture wire hangers.

Saturday, December 4, 2021

Cindy's Job At The Birch Street Nursing Home


There was some confusion today at the Birch Street Nursing Home. Soon after Mr. Smith dropped off the girls, an elderly man came into the activity room. He told me that a young woman had just woken him and kicked him out of his room, saying he didn't have an appointment. He said he'd been living in that room since Wednesday evening, when his grandson dropped him off, and now asked where he was supposed to go. It took a little while, but it became clear that Mr. Tanaka was a new patient at the Birch Street Nursing Home, and that Angel no longer had a room where her doctors could visit her. Since she had a full day of doctor's appointments already scheduled, I asked Mr. Tanaka to join us at the poker table until Angel went home. Later, when Mr. Smith picked up the girls, I had to tell him that only two rooms would be available from now on instead of three. Mr. Smith was upset at the news, but said he would probably rotate the girls so that all three could still meet with their doctors.

Friday, December 3, 2021

Grandmother Winsome's Legal Advice


Keep your car dirty, so that the mud obscuring your license plate number won't seem out of place.