Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Questions About Australia

I'm so pleased that folks around the world are now viewing my blog. I've received messages from people as far away as India and England. But I've noticed very few people from Australia have tuned in. Curious as to why, I had Cindy do some research.

We found part of the reason is their general lack of communication skills.  And, of course, many prisons don't offer internet access, so that knocks off a large portion of the Australian population right there.  But what about the rest of the population, those that are out on parole?

If any Australians do visit my blog, here are some other unanswered questions that my more intelligent viewers would like answered:
  1. Is it true that mental retardation was originally called the Australian Disease?
  2. Is Australia's lower rate of child abuse due to the repulsive quality of the children, or to the fact that the adult male population is mostly behind bars?
  3. Do most Australians have good relationships with their parole officers?
  4. Since there are 100 million sheep in Australia and only 20 million people, what are animals rights groups doing about the other 80 million lonely sheep?
  5. Australia's coastline has more than 10,000 beaches. Some of them are nude beaches. Is this part of an effort to keep non-blind tourists away from the area?
  6. Australia has the lowest population density in the world, at only two people per square kilometer. Is that because even Australians can't stand to be around other Australians?
  7. Since it became illegal to hunt Aboriginal people, and Australians export all their beef, what do they do for dinner?
  8. Why haven't Australian criminals learned to hide evidence in kangaroo pouches?
By the way, out of the top twenty-five deadliest snakes in the world, twenty are found in Australia. Efforts are now being made to relocate the other five.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Winsome Family Thanksgiving Message

Hi, Kiddies. I hope you are all having a wonderful holiday. I wanted to share with you a little of the Winsome Family celebration. Like many families, we gather around the table for a big meal, and each person has a chance to say what he or she is thankful for. Here is what a few members of the Winsome Family had to say this year:

Jane is thankful for an unseasonably cool autumn that's provided her with many chances to wear her newest fur coat.

Edward is thankful for thrift store clown suits, and heavy rains washing away evidence.

Milton is thankful for strawberry ice cream.

Cindy is thankful for those nights when she was allowed to stay up well past her bedtime to help on the Grandmother's Fanny Game blog.

And I am thankful for all these wonderful opportunities to reach out and help so many people. Keep those letters coming, Kiddies!

Friday, November 9, 2012

Hello to England and India

Hi, Kiddies! I am so delighted to learn that folks in England and India have been reading my blog. It makes me happy to be able to reach people all over the world. Please consider following the blog so I can know who you are. And feel free to leave comments, or even to ask questions. I'm always tickled pink to be able to offer advice.

And just a reminder: I am also now on Twitter (@GmotherWinsome, thanks to Cindy, who is such a clever girl).

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Letter From Ruby Whitaker

Sometimes I receive letters from people who are not seeking advice, but who rather want to share their experiences. Such a letter I received today from Mrs. Ruby Whitaker.

Mrs. Whitaker writes, "Our son was afraid of flying. So when our family went on a trip to Hawaii we left him at home. We figured missing out on all the fun would help him get over his silly fear. But when we returned, we found he had died. Apparently five-year-olds aren't capable of taking care of themselves for even a week. I just wanted to let you know so that perhaps our son's death could serve as a warning for other parents in similar circumstances. By the way, Hawaii is beautiful."

Thank you, Ruby, for your letter. I am hoping to get to Hawaii at some point next year.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Grandmother Winsome's Tips For Better Living: November 2, 2012

Have your maid go through the pantry periodically, and donate any expired food to the homeless.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Grandmother Winsome's Halloween Tips (Tip #18)

Halloween Tip #18: And remember, there's no real reason why you can't continue scaring the neighborhood children throughout the year. It'll be even more frightening, as it won't be expected.